Hello Newscheckz, kindly keep me anonymous.
I was in a relationship of almost four years and we broke up as a result of his bad behaviour.
Few months later, i met another person. He is a Pastor actually. We have been dating for three months now but there are certain things i noticed about him: He likes sex a lot and the moment i don’t give him, he makes it look like i owe him.
This issue brought misunderstanding to the extent that he told me among all the people he has dated, i am the only stubborn one because the rest always gives him and literally worship the ground he walks on.
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We discussed the issue but still no change. The moment he sees me, then he gets erection pap! Not that i wear provocative clothes. I have told him severally that i am his girlfriend and so do not owe him sex.
Two; He was once married but lost the wife as a result of childbirth. Before then, he was doing ministry alongside running his own business. But when he lost his wife, he automatically stopped the business and sold everything off.
When i asked him why, he said, then he was frustrated and felt he had nothing to live for. So he wants to dedicate his life into working for God, hence, he is into fulltime ministry.
I tried finding out from him how he feeds and pay his bills, he said God takes care of him.
Third: He still gets in touch with his ex. This lady can call him as early as 4am. Only God knows what she wants to discuss. Although she is aware he is with someone.
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I had picked her call before because he asked me to take any call in his absence. He went ahead to tell me this same ex almost caused him his previous marriage because his ex-wife also complained bitterly, but for the respect she had for him, she did not take any step.
I asked what happened between himself and the ex, he said just when he proposed marriage the lady told him she cannot marry a Pastor.
Another weird thing about him, He just cannot do without comparing me to his ex and how his exes are richer than me and how they fear him and allow him have his way.
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He always wants things done his way and wants me to seek permission from him before doing anything. Sometime ago, in the course of discussion, i told him i want to have a haircut and his response was, is my husband aware! and i replied that which husband because i can’t remember getting married.
Then he told me that before i take any step, i am supposed to seek permission from him because all his exes did that and that was how he trained them.
I noticed whenever the ex-calls and wants him to intercede in prayers for her, she sends money before. So i asked him about that and he said he has trained her to give that in the olden says one does not go to a man of God empty handed. So every prayer topic goes with money.
I told him on a serious note that I don’t like how his ex-calls to disturb with no regards. And whenever she calls, she wants to be on the phone with him all day. She can call a thousand and one time a day and he sometimes ignores the call especially when i am around.
He is so commanding and he tried manipulating me on several occasions, but i always put him right at his place and he will be like i am being hard on him and sometimes he will go all moody and if asked he will go like he misses his ex-wife.
Why? Because i did something to him that pained him. And what is that thing? Refusal of sex and i don’t worship him.
I just do not know what to do.
I can just go on and on. Am not sure if this is confession or I just need someone to smear advice on my brain.. I don’t know.. am tired.