Someone asked me to help them identify a narcissist before you get into a relationship or start dating them.
Narcissists are not perfect actors although they’re good at giving mixed signals. They usually can’t pretend for too long that’s why they rush the dating to get you to commit soonest possible.
One good precaution in all your dating is to never rush or skip a stage, and to always obey your intuition.
Watch out for these signs from early in the relationship:
1. Petty jealousies
2. Outright lying and serial cheating or flirting
3. Making mean jokes at you and apologizing quickly
4. Body shaming or comparing you with other supposedly better people
6. Trying to control what you wear and who you hang out with
7. Fits of rage and you having to apologize for the sake of peace
8. Mood swings more so with men
9. Inconsistent communication where they ghost you and come back with a lot of love and sweet things
10. Inability to apologize and shifting blame
11. Constantly badmouthing their ex
12. Showing up at your place unannounced and pretending it was a surprise
13. Reading your messages or snooping into your phone
14. Seducing your friends or siblings
15. Rushing into having sex or getting pregnant or moving in together. This is the favorite tactic by female narcissists.
Solution? Once you observe a couple of these signs, you must not think they are ‘things they need to work through.’ You’re staring at the tip of the iceberg, the horn of the monster underneath.
Disentangle yourself quickly and if they try to cling on you that’s another proof that they know they’re a bad deal for you. Up the ante until they’re completely out of your life.