Let us describe again the tell-tale signs of narcissists to help victims find clarity by at least putting a name to the demon they’re dealing with:
1. They outrageously cross boundaries of respect to call your parents or siblings and accuse you, or bad mouth you, or bribe them to turn against you.
2. They have two distinct personalities; an angel and a demon. To the world they’re charming and congenial: they’re leaders in church or community, but at home they’re the walking embodiment of cruelty and evil.
3. They’re nice to you in front of people, calling you pet names and holding you, but out of public eye they hate on you and call you all manner of names.
4. They frequently remind you that you’re forever their victim: nobody else wants you; nobody can believe you; you’re too weak or stupid to make it on your own, etc
5. They systematically try to break your spirit; they seem to enjoy when you’re crying or stressed; they do the things they know will hurt you most.
6. They have an addiction they relish: serial cheating; drugs or gambling.
7. They have severe bad temper which they use to terrorize and subdue you. They threaten you with death or serious harm by pulling the handbrake of a car when it’s moving; or they threaten to take their own life in a temper tantrum or childish pity party when you don’t do what they want.
8. They are excellent in apologizing and faking change when you make up your mind to leave them. They can get saved, ask for prayers, convene family meetings and plead for mercy in tears and on their knees until you’re embarrassed not to forgive such a contrite person. Of course you know what the world doesn’t know – that they’re only acting.
9. They totally lack empathy and you often feel like you’re talking to a shell or a tree.
10. They’re intensely insecure and possessive: they track your phone or car or movements, spying on your communication and movements. They constantly accuse you of cheating.
11. They’re compulsive in their communication: they can call you 70 times in a row or send you 80 messages. You’re not allowed to miss their communication. You should drop everything to attend to their call.
12. If you catch them cheating it’s your fault and you’ll pay for questioning them. They’re all-powerful and you’re a nobody and you need to be put back to your place.
13. They systematically separate you from everyone and isolate you socially. They can show up at your work place to cause drama just to embarrass you.
14. They disable you financially by tricking you to quit your job or take loans or they leave all responsibilities to you.
15. They play victim until people think you’re the crazy and difficult one and they are helpless victims.
Solution? You treat narcissistic abuse the same way you treat cancer: cut it off. Kill the relationship at once. The more you delay the more the damage spreads and the higher the chances of death or irreparable damage.
One thing parents ought to know – If you are overprotective over your children, you are actually raising up potential narcissists of/for the future. Too much attention on children spoils them. When they grow up and find that their partners are not giving them the kind of attention they feel they deserve, they often become aggressive/ violent . In extreme cases, they can kill!? Drug-abuse might worsen a situation that already exists.
And the narcissist, when they cannot harm the partner, can even commit suicide! “My wife/husband is frustrating me!” ?
Dealing with a narcissist regularly is like having a pet tiger: you always have to be careful that one day he’s gonna see you as dinner. But if you don’t have a choice, negotiate hard. This is nobody to be win-win with.
Always reward behavior, never words. They get what they want when they do what you want.
There’s this concept called “narcissistic injury.” Pointing out a narcissist isn’t all they think they are can be like pulling the pin on a grenade. A grenade you have to see every day of your life.
Realize that narcissism is an identity, just like religion or politics. When you argue about it, people don’t fold or change their minds — they just hate you. And narcissists are among the most vindictive people you’ll ever meet.
Burst their narcissistic b…
When someone posts one too many selfies or flex pics on their dating profile or talks about themselves constantly during a first date, we might call them a narcissist.
But a true narcissist is someone with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). It’s a mental health condition characterized by:
an inflated sense of importance
a deep need for excessive attention and admiration
lack of empathy for others
often having troubled relationships
What it boils down to, says licensed therapist Rebecca Weiler, LMHC, is selfishness at the (usually extreme) expense of others, plus the inability to consider others’ feelings at all.
You want tips to deal with a demon….a narrcassist is a demon doing the devil’s handwork here on earth….LEAVE….I left after 10 years of abuse tho I didn’t know anything like narrcasism,but my life was a nightmare…if I knew what I know now I would not have spent an extra hour next to that man….even when you leave they still continue with the emotional abuse,they will play victim,lie about everything ,turn everyonr against you,turn kids against you,play mind games n tricks,torture the kids emotions by giving false promises n failing to pay child support n blame you for it,I could never have believed that a human being could have such a twisted n evil personality…..they will toture you watch you loose your mind n blame you for it.